NOTE: This post was left in DRAFT mode since I wrote it on February 1st, 2015. It has finally seen the light of day (on July 8th, 2023!) as I’m moving this site from an outdated (and problematic!) WordPress install to static HTML web pages so that my web host will quit charging me $5/month for access to an old version of PHP (V7.4). FYI: I had grand plans but I didn’t end up “sharing some of my thoughts and feelings here on my blog and also on FaceBook” as I written below.
True confessions time: I don’t love ME as much as I would like to, or honestly would be good for me. And I’m pretty much like every other person on planet earth these days. I could stand to love myself more…and that starts with being less critical of myself.
Sure, we all have shortcomings in our own eyes. And we’ve been taught really, really well to look at how we screwed up, rather than our victories. Case in point: How many of us have gotten papers back while we were in school with “-5” on them or even the dreaded “-1” that says, “Try harder! You’re still not measuring up. You’re still not perfect!”
As part of our upbringing we’ve been taught to focus on the negative, by constantly reminding us of how badly we’ve “missed the mark.” Rarely, if ever, is there a celebration around getting a 95%, or 80%, or even 65% “right” which can be a HUGE victory!
When I was in college studying to get my degree in Electrical Engineering, we had one class from a visiting German professor. Unfortunately for all, but especially the students, his English left a LOT to be desired. I don’t think there was a person in that 400 level Controls class who understood the material – with the possible exception of one person. His name was Greg Wisdom! Talk about being set up to be forced into high standards – with a last name like Wisdom, you can’t be a C student!
When it came time for the first test in that Controls class, we were all befuddled by the test to say the least. When the Prof’ handed back the tests we were all devastated by the scores – yes even Greg was. He got a 40!
Normally, Greg was considered to be the “curve wrecker” because if the prof’s didn’t throw out his scores, most of the rest of class would fail if they were being graded on a curve. He had gotten a 40% out of 100. Just imagine how that must have felt to him.
And then we found out what the average was on the test…it was a four! Yes four out of 100! And most of us breathed a sigh of relief.
Greg’s opinion of himself certainly rebounded when he heard that, but knowing him, I’m sure there was still a bit of self criticism regardless.
So where in your life have unrealistic expectations hurt you, or caused your opinion of yourself to be less than it might otherwise be? I know there are a number of situations where that’s the case for me. And as you would expect, those most certainly are tappable incidents.
My promise to myself, at least for February – the month that brings love to the forefront with Valentines Day – is to do something every day to show myself that I love myself. And one of those things will be to do some tapping in order to release the emotional charge around some of those incidents that “left a mark” and lowered my love toward myself.
I encourage you to do the same. Take some time to reflect on how kind and wonderful you really are, because I’m pretty sure that if you’re interested in reading the kinds of things that I share here, that you’re not the world’s biggest jerk. That title is definitely reserved for someone else! And we’ve all probably got a few names to contribute to the list of nominees! 😉
In addition to doing some tapping today, I took a proactive step toward loving myself more and attracting love into my life. I invested in a course from my friend and EFT Tapping colleague Stefan Gonick. His course is called Finding The Love You Want: The Breakthrough Program. Stefan and I are part of a year long mentoring and EFT Tapping program by Margaret Lynch. Several of the other members of this mentoring program have started in on Stefan’s program as well, and have given it rave reviews. So I couldn’t help myself – as a single guy who’s last relationship ended more than 2 years ago – it’s time (past time actually!) to not only find the love I want, but the love I deserve too!
I’m starting Stefan’s program today, and I’ll be sharing some of my thoughts and feelings here on my blog and also on FaceBook. If you’re inspired by what I share, or even if you’re just curious about what’s in the program, I’d encourage you to click on this link and learn more. I’ve set up a special page where you can see the video that Stefan put together that talks about the program. A bit of brutal honesty here, in my opinion at the beginning of the video Stefan looks a little “stiff” or awkward, but as the video progresses you’ll find some great content and really come to appreciate what he has to share. I know that I do, that’s for sure!
Oh, and if you choose to purchase one of his programs through my affiliate link, I’ve got a bonus for you. If you send a copy of your email receipt to me at Brad (at) WithEFTtapping.com I’ll be happy to get on the phone (or Skype if you’re outside the continental US) for a free 30 minute tapping session on any topic you’d like. And I’ll also send you a copy of a mind map that I created that I call “How to create more love in your life!” It has a whole bunch of suggested places to go looking for subconscious limitations and messages about love. I’ve gotten great feedback on it, and I can’t wait to share it with you!